Excerpts from Unbundling
Your Divorce
Appendix 7: Self Test
BE HONEST. Do the following self-test in writing. Don’t just read it and answer it mentally. You won’t be as thorough in your analysis if you don’t force yourself to put pen to paper. You also won’t be as effective in revising it as needed if you don’t have a written record to refer to.
GOALS FOR LIMITING LEGAL SERVICES:
What are my goals in my divorce? [See Appendix 8 for more information on this.]
- Why do I want to limit my attorney’s involvement? Save money Retain more control over the process?
- Why? Retain more control over my spouse? [Lose 5 points if your answer is yes]
- Other reasons? List all perceived advantages.
- What risks do I see if I represent myself in whole or in part? List all perceived disadvantages.
MY STRENGTHS AND WEAKNESSES
What am I good at? [Be brutally honest.] Paperwork, Writing, Public speaking, Computers, Investigation and information gathering, Research, either at the library or on the internet, Analysis of documents, Financial planning and analysis, Decision making, Am I disciplined in my work habits? Organized?
Other skills I have which will assist me:
- Attention to detail
- Persistence
- Follow through
- Can I consistently meet deadlines?
- Can I understand and use support guidelines
- Do computers intimidate me?
Which of the above do I really hate doing [Be brutally honest here; if you really hate doing something, you won’t like it any better if you are doing it as part of your divorce. Instead, you’ll hate it even more and do a lousy job.]
- If I’m not good at it, can I find someone else to teach me how to do it, supervise or check my work?
- If I’m not good at it, can I find someone else who is and hire them to do that part?
- Which tasks would be better delegated to someone with greater expertise?
- Who would that be?
- Which specific tasks am I going to delegate or seek help with? Write them here, and write the name or designation of the person who will help you next to each one (i.e., accountant, attorney, etc.)
TIME COMMITMENT:
- Do I have the time to do it properly? Will my other responsibilities suffer?
- Is there a way to compensate for the time loss by delegating some of my other responsibilities temporarily?
EMOTIONAL CONSEQUENCES:
- Can I handle it emotionally, or am I too close to the situation to make good decisions?
- Am I motivated by a desire to keep up the fight?
- Am I able to stand firm and not give up too much simply to have it over with?
- Am I trying to get even for things my spouse did to me in the past?
- Can I separate my emotions from decisions involving money and property?
- Can I separate money and property from decisions involving the kids?
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