Why I wrote Everything I Needed To Know I Learned After Law School As a young lawyer in a busy firm, I didn’t get much hands-on mentoring. The theory there was “sink or swim,” especially for the first woman lawyer in the firm (“girl,” they called me). Half of them expected me to fail, and it wasn’t politically wise to ask for too much help, especially since I was very ambitious and fully intended to make partner (which I did four years after passing the bar). Fortunately for me, a couple of old timers from other firms took me under their wings at critical points in my early career, and prevented me from making some serious mistakes. As a result, although I turned out to be a good swimmer, I vowed that “sink or swim” was not the way I’d train the lawyers who came after me. One of my jobs at the firm was to screen applicants for new associates. I’d interview the promising ones, and send the top candidates on to the partners for whom they would be working. I loved interviewing the new lawyers, looking for the talent, enthusiasm, and that gleam in the eye which denoted someone who really wanted to be the best. I especially loved training the new family lawyers. I carried this love of mentoring when I opened my own firm. I closed my law practice in 1998, and devoted my time exclusively to private judging, thereby eliminating (I thought) any further opportunity to mentor young lawyers. Then, some years later, I met a young woman with whom I connected. Like the early me, she was very bright and ambitious, but without good role models and meaningful mentoring. I took her under my wing. She would email me questions, and I would respond. Our dialogue was gratifying to me, and I hope, helpful to her. One day, after a particularly satisfying exchange, I was sitting under my lemon tree sipping a glass of wine and feeling sorry for myself because my mentoring days were over. After all, there isn’t much call for a private judge to mentor newbie lawyers. Just as I was working myself into real self-pity, it hit me. Sue, you can WRITE! I may not be training new lawyers in my own practice, but I can certainly offer that experience and training on paper. As with my other books, once I realized it wanted to be written, the book wrote itself. I spent the next four days in a writing frenzy, covering everything that nobody had taught me, all things I learned the hard way, and everything that I wish someone had alerted me to in advance. I then emailed the young lawyer I had been communicating with, and told her there was a way she could repay the help I’d given her. I would email her the manuscript, and she had to read it, and tell me what else was missing that someone in her position would need to know. She made a number of helpful suggestions. Some colleagues generously reviewed the manuscript, and there you have it. I still love talking to young lawyers, still teach mentoring workshops whenever I get the chance, and do my best to pass what I know to the next generation. Because young family lawyers rarely have any money, and the cost of publishing has risen since I first entered the publishing world, I’m doing it as an e-book, which can be easily downloaded (and updated). If you buy the book and find something I have missed or that you would like to know more about, please email me and I’ll include it in a later version. Ordering Info
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